"Strange day."

This is kinda strange,
But I feel a little more alive again,
After listening to a John Mayer song on my Launchcast.

(Okay, it's not terribly cool,
To admit that you like John Mayer,
But whatever.)

As I had mentioned in my previous post,
I still miss Joy a lot,
Even though it has been 4 months since he passed away.

I've been thinking...

And I think I need a place to deposit some of my love.
If no girlfriend, nevermind,
I can always get a new pet.
Sure,
I have 2 box turtles who reside in the backyard,
But man,
I can't really relate to them that well.

They're good pets,
But it's hard to think of them as my best friends.
And they don't even have names!

Maybe getting a girlfriend or boyfriend is better.
At least they come toilet-trained.
I hope.

Nah.

On 2nd thoughts,
I don't want anyone or anything at all.
I also don't want to work.

I just want to alternate between sleeping,
And going online,
And then kill myself before my savings run out.

Man.
How can anyone not fall for a guy this ambitious?

Speaking of falling,
I remember a few discussions on that topic with my friends,
During the numerous breaks I had as a student in NUS.

"So,
How do you know when you're in love?"

"When your partner has the ability,
To bring out the worst in you."

I wasn't the one who said the last sentence,
So don't flame if you don't agree.

I'm not sure how true it is,
Afterall,
How many times have you heard so-and-so say,
How his girl brings out the best in him?

Or was that just a Blue song?

But I certainly do recall doing a few disgraceful,
And out-of-character things when I was supposedly in love.

Firstly,
I never could imagine myself as a guy who'll hit a girl.
Ermm.
I didn't exactly "hit" her,
But I did shove her very hard.
So hard that she fell onto some passerby.

It still haunts me,
Whatever I did.

But I secretly feel a lot better,
When I hear stories about battered wives.
Not in the sadistic sense,
But at least I'm not the worst, you know?

And how about the time,
When she wanted to leave me behind,
By storming off and getting into a taxi?

I ran after the cab,
And pounded so furiously on the windows,
The driver had no choice but to stop,
In case I really did smash the glass.

If these ugly episodes can be counted as love,
Then I think I never want to be in love again.